keeping up with Chloe

chloe is seven and growing up in ways that constantly amaze me.  sometimes i look at my children and am forced to recognize that they are no longer toddlers or even preschoolers... they are becoming, well,... people.  part of letting children become people, i'm learning, is allowing them to make choices while still, very subtly, guiding those choices.  sure, dictating their every move is still possible, but i don't think that is the wisest option in the long run.

recently, i spoke with chloe about choosing some good books to read.  she was not making inappropriate choices, but i felt that she wasn't really choosing anything.  being an avid and very good reader at such a young age has its challenges, believe it or not.  the books that are written for K-2 are typically easy readers.    since she had read those in preK, finding something that was challenging and yet age-appropriate has not been easy.  i don't feel the need to completely censor everything, but i also don't want my 7 year old daughter only reading books about teenage girls and dating.  we'll have enough of that.  some day.

so, i decided to try a different approach.  patrick and chuck have enjoyed reading the same books and then discussing them for some time.  (patrick, of course, is another story.  presently that boy is reading his second book by Tolkien.  he's a machine.)  doing this allows chuck a good starting point for discussion with patrick, as well as allowing him a window into what he's reading.  so, in similar fashion, i told chloe that if she would read the Little House books, i'd read them with her.  she gladly accepted the challenge and has enjoyed trying to stay ahead of me and talking about the parts that have caught her attention.  interestingly enough, i never read these books as a child, so now i get to enjoy them as well.  her added bonus is that we are also renting the tv series from the library, one disc at a time.  the kids are all loving them.  and, truly, it's nice to be able to return to something that is just a bit simpler... and safer.

vegas or bust... (or plan B... but either way...)

we leave tomorrow!
although chuck and i are not exactly "Vegas people" we are "get away for a few days" kinda people, and this trip is coming at a great time...
for those of you who don't know, we are heading to Las Vegas for a children's ministry conference (for real!) at the Church of South Las Vegas.  seems like an odd place to hold such a conference, but the itinerary really looks great and they've given us great accommodations!  we are staying at Southpoint, leaving bwi tomorrow and returning home on sunday.  my incredibly generous mother in law is arriving today to stay with the kids for the duration for our trip.  i really think they'll have a great time with her, and i know that chuck and i will enjoy a few days away.  he has been really busy lately.  this week is his school's science fair, which he and another teacher are running this year.  on top of that, he's been taking online grad classes which require paper after paper after paper.  he's wondering if he'll be able to slow himself down enough to relax.  i think he'll be fine...

i've had a few friends give me some pointers as to what we should see while in Vegas.  thankfully, we don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time, and it sounds like there is lots to do just by "seeing the sights."   even better, the forecast predicts weather in the mid to upper 60s and that sounds great right about now.  i've decided to enjoy this for all it's worth... especially since it comes right around the same time as my birthday.  but even for all the fun stuff that goes along with the trip, at this point, all the down time in the airport and on the plane is what sounds the most appealing.  all that time to SIT and do nothing... unless i feel like it.  what a luxury.

btw, i'll have more to say later, but the book i just read was really very good.  check it out if you get the chance...

have a great week, everyone!

keeping on

blogging has presented me with mixed feelings lately.  i'd love to whine about it... but as i've long since vowed not to use my blog as my own personal pity party (that gets old really fast) i'm going to brush past it.

there.  i'm done.

today marks Day 11 of being snowed in with chuck and the kids.  with the exception of last friday night when we ate at arby's and sunday when we made it to church, we have been in this house.  i am not tired of chuck.  i am not tired of my kids.  actually, i have rather enjoyed it - like an unexpected vacation.  however, just like at the end of any vacation, i am ready to get back to my ordered, structured life.  the kids miss school and are ready for a change of scenery.  as i type this, they are doing school, because, even though we don't homeschool, we are firm believers that we, as their parents, are responsible for our children's education.  i'll leave it at that.  for now.

rather than feel trapped in my own home, i've tried to see this as an opportunity to focus inward for a change.  no, i have not gone crazy working on home projects (although chuck did get 2 walls spackled and painted!)... but i did get to spend some extra time in the kitchen and have tried several new recipes and have a few meals in the freezer as a result.  that's a good feeling.

focusing on the inside of my house has allowed me to really get a closer look at my children, as well.  sometimes, the everyday pace of life doesn't provide as many opportunities to be intentional about parenting.  two blizzards in one week, however, does!  here is what i have learned.

patrick, at 8 years old, is balancing the illusive line between being a young child and a young man.  i had been noticing a difference in his attitude (patrick has never been blatantly disobedient, so parenting him can be challenging if we are not looking for the subtle stuff...) and chuck and i agreed that it was time he be held to a higher level of expectations.  the mom in me has a hard time with this - seeing him be pushed, at times, into manhood (boy, get your coat on and get out here and help me shovel!) but i trust his father and agree that i want patrick to turn into a man like chuck rather than a woman like me.  the result is an aspiring young man who is starting to think more about others than he does about himself.  

having 7 year old chloe at home with me has been very eye opening as well.  typically, she is my child who flies under the radar - never bothering us with problems because she does not enjoy being the center of attention.  ironically, though, she seems to have the best sense of humor and is so dry that she can put either one of us in our place without even cracking a smile.  i love that about her.  even more, i love that when, on occasion, she throws out a sarcastic comment at the wrong time, she'll quickly say, "i've gone too far, huh?"  man, i love her.  she and i were talking this past week and i asked her what bothers her the most.  she told me she gets freaked out being in the same room with any arguing.  she gets nervous when someone in her class is being corrected by the teacher or if her friends are fighting.  in fact, she told me that she'd rather be on stage in front of a hundreds of people than be present during a disagreement.  i've always known that she is the peace keeper in the family, but it's been interesting to discover that one reason for this is that she'd rather give in than cause conflict.  i can certainly identify with this part of her personality, but i am trying to teach her that sometimes it's ok to disagree.  

lucy is embracing 5 and is so good at it!  as always, she loves life and wants to experience every last bit of it.  however, she seems to really be trying to grow up a bit.  the older she gets, the more sensitive and less silly she becomes.  this is a problem when her 4 year old brother knows every last button to push to set her off.  we've been teaching her that allowing him to make her cry makes him her boss because she's giving him power.  it's a hard lesson to learn... but she's getting there.  one surprising aspect of lucy's personality is how when the house gets a little too chaotic (emotionally) she runs around trying to clean up.  as fun-loving as she is, she loves to see things in their place.  whenever i catch her doing this, she tells me she's practicing to be a mom.  i don't know how to feel about that... especially if she thinks that's all i do!

4 year old tucker is growing up fast.  having been raised by us and grandma has had its blessings and challenges because he has learned where to run and hide!  as he is growing out of toddler-hood and into childhood, he is learning that he is responsible for his choices... which means that he will have to sit at the table for an hour and a half to eat dinner, he can get himself dressed, and he will not win in a verbal battle with his parents.  by far, tucker has been our most strong-willed child - so, at times, we've had to step up our parenting intensity a bit.  it's been good, though, because he's starting to self-correct and just avoid the bad choices altogether.  he is still fascinated by numbers and spends most of his time trying to figure out who's number (age) is bigger and how many more years it will take him to get to another perosn's number.  by far, though, tucker's most exciting bit of progress is that he is now reading!  we're working our way through the Victory Drill Book and other short vowel story books, and he is working on mastering his first ring of sight words.  we're so proud of him, and reading has been a great way to help him grow up.  

chuck and i have really enjoyed the time we've had together as a family and as a couple for the past week and a half.  i decided to resist the temptation to get sick of being stuck with my family... and i'm glad i did.

let me 'splain. no, there is too much. let me sum up.

100 points to anyone who identifies that reference.

either way, summing up is going to be a better idea than explaining the last few weeks.

of course, the holidays are always a busy time... and we've enjoyed every last bit.

the kids enjoyed the 2 ft of snow we got right before christmas - giving them just one day of school that week.  chuck and i had lots of fun shoveling and longingly watching our neighbors using their snowblowers.  thankfully, one of them helped out with the end of our driveway at one point.  still, i can't help but wonder if maybe that's on chuck's list for the future.

i really enjoyed watching the kids experience christmas each year.  we had everything ready to go on christmas eve, so we had lots of time to sit around and enjoy each other.  christmas morning was pretty stress-free, too.  the kids seem to be developing a true appreciation for watching everyone open their presents as well as opening their own.  they were pretty patient - and appreciative.  and that is something that takes time!

one of my bigger challenges this christmas was working and traveling with a 3 month old puppy.  parsley had been learning the ropes at our house but was not demonstrating the best manners when it came to other people.  as a puppy, she's full of energy - but beyond that, i have a feeling she's rather high energy.  she did well with all the traveling - and with being in different places.  i had to spend quite a bit of extra time walking her while we were away in an attempt to wear her out before putting her back in her crate, but it was kind of nice.  and... our many walks also helped to keep off those dreaded christmas pounds that usually find their way into my jeans.  all in all, a good deal!

experiencing the chaos of christmas and visiting friends with a puppy is a lot like experiencing it with a newborn - it takes a lot of extra time and effort.  and i came away from the last few weeks wondering if i was making any progress with this dog at all.  my multiple trips outside to have her use the "potty" were spent watching her eat snow... only to come inside and do her business on the kitchen floor.  frustrating, to say the least.  any little freedom would get her so hyper that i was keeping her crated as much as possible.  all the while, i was reading any advice i could find... only to see that i was doing all the right things.  such information should be comforting, but i guess i was just being a bit impatient.  (imagine that!)  thankfully, the holidays - and all their excitement - came and went, the kids went back to school, our "normal" schedule resumed, and parsley turned 4 months.  amazingly enough, that combination of events had a magical effect on our pup, and she seems to have turned a corner.  she seems to really "get" her housebreaking regime (with a few puddles here and there) and has even earned quite a bit of supervised freedom to run around in the house for most of the day.  as i write this post, she's on the floor with tucker and kyle and is peacefully chewing on a bone instead of chewing on them.  i feel so proud.

for all of you non-dog people, i apologize for all of the extra info.  anyone who has ever raised a puppy knows that these things are big deal.  and, regardless, i'm pleased to see our lives return to some sense of normalcy.

on another note, this weekend, my family will finally be celebrating our christmas.  nothing like getting around to it 2 weeks later.  ah, well, when you have 5 siblings with 5 different families and lives it's not as easy as it used to be!  my mother is trying to maintain a sense of humor about the whole thing... but this is a first for her.  i've decided that any christmas celebration that takes place after new year's will from now on be referred to as Festivus.  and there will be the airing of grievances.  a good time will be had by all, i'm sure.

i still need to upload all our christmas pictures... but i figured i'd wait till all the christmases were over.  we also, finally, had our family pictures taken - for the first time in 5 years, meaning that we now have a complete family picture.  complete with tucker, that is.

hope everyone is enjoying the new year so far... and that you are enjoying the return to normalcy.

playing hooky

every now and again, chuck decides to take a day off for no other reason than to just spend time with us.  last friday, we surprised the kids when they woke up and we told them they didn't have to go to school.  we went fishing instead...

chuck spent the night before getting the fishing poles ready and determining what was missing from his tackle box.  after a leisurely morning at home, we were off to havre de grace for a day on the water.

they definitely did some fishing.  and even caught a few small ones...

tucker enjoyed his version of fishing:

mom casts

i immediately reel it in and check for fish

mom casts again

i reel it in and check for fish...again

mom casts...

chuck's "fishing" looked like this:

bait their hooks

cast their rods

begin to bait my own hook but put it down so i can reel in a 3 inch fish

remove lousy blue gill

return to my own line, only to repeat the process all over again

still, they all seemed to have a good time... even if much of that time was spent sitting

and looking

 

and waiting

but at least there was stuff to look at.

 

and, ultimately, it was just nice to watch them be who they are...

and who they're trying to become.